Oscar's Night

I love fashion! I watch the Oscar's for the movies....sort of....I watch it to see what the peeps are wearing and then I watch the fashion wrap up. I know what you're thinking...WOW...what a nerd! And you would be correct!

So I'm watching the fashion wrap up and Joan Rivers, who is admittedly more plastic than a life size lego statue of Darth Vader, but she's also just about as forgiving was the leader of the fashion-fest. The other three people were one of my favorite gays, a women who is GORGEOUS but decided that a size ten was too big so she's now a size six, and a woman who looks like a skeleton that was wearing a skin suit with long hair.

My beef is this, Queen Latifa ROCKED IT! I have a girl crush on Her Majesty the Queen so she can really do any wrong in my book...anyway...when they started to talk about her...they said you NAILED it! But they couldn't leave it at that....NOPE! She NAILED IT for a big woman.

Wait, what? So these skinny plastic bitches are going to point out that my girl the Queen is overweight? Seriously? SERIOUSLY? Like we don't have eyes to see that the Her Majesty is bigger than your average boy with boobs. I was also expecting that they would tell me that she was black....WHAT....surely not! My eyes MUST be failing me. Queen Latifa looked AMAZING! Full stop. Oh but wait....Mo'nique got the same treatment. She also looked great for a bigger woman. Mo'nique...GIRL...you owned the moment and stole the night. FULL STOP!

But here is where I just wanted to drive to L.A. and force feed any and EVERY one of those anorexic dankfaces a fry. Just one...that'll make them go postal! Anyways....when they started talking about Kate Winslet. Perfect bodied, mother of two (I think) Kate Winslet. Joan stated that she was chunky. KATE WINSLET! The skeleton with skin said that was years ago...Titanic days...WHAT?! I thought that she looked beautiful, thin, amazing!

It was at that moment that I decided to make it my business to let EVERYONE know that they are amazing just the way they are. Barring health issues, if you are a healthy person at 112, rock the hell out of it. If you are healthy at 220, own that SH*T! Be you! Be confident! And all the haters might want to fill their mouths with food and not judgmental words.

I met someone...life is cruel

So I met this guy...and he is great! He's getting his MBA, hard worker, dedicated student, respects women, tall, dark and HANDSOME. And here is the kicker...he's TAKEN! Yes, that's my life.

Cruel? Yep! Seriously! I mean....He's been with the same woman for years. They have a child together.

Look left, look right, look up....you are being punk'd by God! SIGH!

I try everything

I swear if there is something new or limited edition the I'm SO in! I'll buy it or get my friends to buy it and try it. For example Snus. It is a spit less chew. I don't smoke or dip or ANYTHING like it. But I pulled up to a Circle K one day and there is was. Right there on the door. Snus...it's new....it's great...it had to be mine. See I'm just so conflicted! I have a friend that dips and secretly smokes. So I asked if he'd ever tried it.

HAPPINESS! He had tried it and even better...he had some on him. He took it out and it smelled like spearmint, apparently it tasted like it too. My soul could be a peace. :) I'm creating a page of things I've tried, shows and movies I've tried....look to the right...thats where you'll find it.

Corporate America, could it be....SATAN

Okay lets have an honest moment RIGHT now. Corporate America sucks all sorts of miserable things. My friend didn't get the promotion that she applied for today. Why you ask? Well, I'm going to give you a few reasons. My friend is in customer service she is sweet and gets the job done, but she isn't some over caffeinated ditz that bows to THE MAN. She's wonderful, she's even a team player. But she doesn't "look" right for full time. And what makes things worse is that her manager lied to her as to why she didn't know about the job yet. LAME!

I've avoided the game of corporate America until my 30th year. And I've been miserable! It's back stabbing and deceitful. Pushing the people under you to do more and more so that you look good. It's entirely dysfunctional. Unfortunately it's a functioning dysfunction. If it were functional then it would change. But the millions and millions of dollars that are brought in through dysfunction keeps the cycle going.

It beat me down in 2 1/2 years so much so that I've had to take a break. It's sad but it's true. Why did my friend not get the job? Not pretty enough, too pretty, too smart, not smart enough? Who knows. All I know is that she wasn't given the promotion and now she has to train the woman that they are giving the job to. My question is this.....how do people NOT go postal more often? I would be lying if I haven't thought of or heard of my friends wanting to walk into work and blow up their boss' office, with their boss in it.

That's just messed up!

Online dating

So I'm online. Of course I am. I'm single. Here's the thing. Online dating is...well...difficult. I'm on an interracial website because I like the chocolate skinned brothers. Anywho, I was online today and I guy wanted to IM me. Perfect, I'm in. This guy who will be known as 12 incher....started talking to me with a hello and a howz the weather where you are. He told me he was 6'6 and 275. HELLO... tell me more hot stuff. Well in 4.9 seconds it went from how long have you dated black guys to I have a 12 inch schlong that's as wide as a Red Bull. OMG! I mean OMG! Really. I don't even know this dude's name and I'm getting the dimensions of his penis?!?! Welcome to dating of the 21st Century. Joy!